If you're an atheist and swear on the bible, have you committed perjury?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If vegetarians eat vegetables what do humanitarians eat?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Will you die if you get scared half to death twice?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If horrific is akin to horrible, why isn't terrific akin to terrible?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Who really took the bite out of the Apple logo?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If I break the laws of Physics do I go to jail?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is an orange an orange but an apple not a red?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why isn't phonic spelled the way it sounds?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do psychics have to ask for your name?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do we put suits in a garment bag and garments in a suitcase?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do we drive on a parkway and park in a driveway?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why does glass eventually get thicker towards the bottom?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is there an expiration date on SOUR cream?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Do boxer shorts box?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do doughnuts have holes?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
How can there be self-help groups?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is yawning contagious?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do phone companies give you a number to call if your phone doesn't work?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do people look up when they think?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If the cops arrest a mime do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why does slow down and slow up mean the same thing?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding what is it expanding into?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it BEGINS ringing?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
How does one actually zip their lip?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Do married people live longer than single people do or does it just seem longer?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Do married people live longer than single people do or does it just seem longer?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding what is it expanding into?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Will wearing short sleeve shirts show your support for the right to bare arms?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
How is it possible to have a civil war?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why are there 5 syllables in the word monosyllabic?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do they call it the department of interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If taught, do gorillas really understand sign language?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is the word abbreviate so long?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If you can't drink and drive why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor, and why do bars have parking lots?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
When an elevator is overloaded with passengers who is criminally responsible?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it do the other trees make fun of it?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it do the other trees make fun of it?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Where do swear words come from?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Where do swear words come from?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't grow in it?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is Greenland white?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why is it called a building when it's already built?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 10, 2012
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why is the fear of long words called hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
How much money, in pennies, is lying on the streets of the world?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why is it when u tell a person that there are 400 billion stars in the sky & he'll believe u, tell him a bench is wet & he has to touch it?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why are they called apartments when they are stuck together?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why did God give men nipples?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Are people born stupid or do they have to work at it?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why do they call it quicksand when it sucks you down slowly?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
What do you plant to grow a seedless watermelon?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, than who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead"?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation or a murder?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why do we pay tolls on the freeway?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If a turtle doesn't have a shell is he homeless or naked?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
When I erase a word with a pencil where does it go?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If a penny costs 2.3 cents to make, why is it still only worth a penny?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
How come the idiot is always in charge?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
How can someone draw a blank?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
If a vampire can't see himself in a mirror, why is his hair always so neat?
— Sieska Mazmur(@sieees) March 11, 2012
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